"Real"ationship

"And now, just as you accepted Christ Jesus as your Lord, you must continue to follow Him. Let your roots grow down into Him, and let your lives be built on Him. Then your faith will grow strong in the truth you were taught, and you will overflow with thankfulness." - Colossians 2:6-7

I became a Christian when I was 8 years old. I remember that Sunday well. I had my Jem Barbie doll with me and clung to her as I walked to the front of the church to tell Brother Mickey that I was ready to be baptized. (I am pretty sure that a large part of this decision was influenced by the fact that my older sister had made this decision recently and I didn't want to be left out.) I stood at the front of the church and got lots of handshakes and hugs after the service and a few weeks later I stepped foot into the baptismal and made my public profession of faith before getting dunked. I had prayed the prayer of salvation and been baptized, which in my 8 year old mind was all I needed to do.

But this thinking lacked roots and a foundation on him. Instead, over the next several years, God was a part of my life, but not necessarily the foundation that I built everything else on.

Over the past 22 years God has brought different people and experiences into my life that have shown me that yes, I was saved, but there was so much more He wanted for me to have. He wanted a relationship with me. He wanted me to have an amazing testimony of things that could only be explained by His power.

I could share lots of stories with you of some of these people or experiences, but that would take way too long, so I will just focus on this past year. About two years ago I went through a bit of an emotional come-apart. I was depressed and broken-hearted. It was during that time that I pulled out my Bible and clung to God's promises that He loved me unconditionally and had a "peace that passes all understanding" for me. This time was difficult for me, but I wouldn't trade it for anything because it ignited a new fire in my heart to become closer to Jesus and to experience a true relationship with Him. Fast forward a year and I was kicking off 2011 with a desire to see God move in my life.

Over the past year God has used several new friends in my life to draw me closer to Him. I began asking God some hard questions (What does true faith and trust and dependence on You look like? How can I ask for the desires of my heart without knowing if You will fulfill those desires?) and really seeking the answers in His word. In all of my searching I simply felt God whispering to me, "Come closer. Press into me. I have something so beautiful planned for you." And in that process God really started to change the desires of my heart. I now come to Him and say, "I want what You want," whereas before that totally freaked me out. What if He wanted me to be single for the rest of my life? What if He wanted me to move somewhere scary by myself and be a missionary? What if He wanted me to do the impossible? When my mind swirled with these anxious thoughts, He would again whisper to me, "Trust and obey. Have I not been faithful? From my vantage point I can see what's coming, and even if you don't think you can handle it, I know you can and I will be with you every step of the way."

I have been challenged, convicted, and encouraged over the past year in ways that I never have before. I have begun to experience a "real"ationship with God that is full of grace and love and excitement. I have planted those roots in Him and made Him my foundation. The amazing ways that God moved in my life during 2011 only causes me to wait expectantly for what He has in store for 2012.

"In the morning, Lord, you hear my voice; in the morning I lay my requests before you and wait expectantly." - Psalm 5:3